1. Today my son had his preschool Christmas party. Pretty normal, end of year celebration, right? WRONG!! This particular party did not just symbolise the end of another year. It was the final year that my last 'baby' will be attending preschool as he has just turned 5 and will be hitting primary school next year. Not only that, as I've mentioned previously he has additional needs so it's an extra tough transition time for us. But that is not all!! This preschool almost closed down last year & I was a part of a small group of parents who fought for it to remain open for 2012. We became a really close knit group of friends as all people do who have common interests at heart. We also became really close with the preschool teachers & organised some special gifts for them, so I knew the day was going to be a happy/sad occasion & yep, I was super anxious!!
On the other side of that day, yes it was happy/sad & there were tears flowing, however I have a feeling tomorrow may be worse...
2. Tomorrow is my son's final day at preschool and the absolute last time I will see all of the wonderful teachers & set foot inside the wonderful preschool. It is his last day, but is also the last day for the preschool altogether. We did manage to save it for 2012, however, that was it & now it must close. A very sad end to a community icon & actually the very same preschool I attended 30 odd years ago. This time not so happy/sad - mostly sad/sad & yep, I'm anxious about that!!
If there's one thing I've discovered about myself this year & with huge thanks to the Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation, it's that I'm an emotional eater/drinker & when my anxiety is at a high it is my big danger zone!!
3.This afternoon was difficult - nothing new with the hectic life I lead - teaching, running a household, trying to raise two happy & healthy children and particularly at this time of year - I know!! It was extra difficult because my 'ADDitional needs son' was extra wired up - party day, end of preschool looming, swimming lessons, mother on verge of her own anxiety meltdown, father working afternoon shift!
So by the time 6pm came around I was not coping so well. It was lucky there was no wine in the house, because that would be gone. There were however, cheese and bacon rolls...3 times I picked one of those things up to put into my mouth & 3 times I put it back in the packet. At the time I actually felt like running out the door (taking flight - as you know I like to do), but as that was not doable with hubby at work and so, it was time to 'ride the emotional waves'!
I must admit I was not strong enough to do this alone & before I took a bite of that cheese & bacon roll, I put an SOS out to some of the 12wbt peeps I have 'met' along the way and a number of them came to my rescue. I don't even know some of these ladies in 'real life', but in my 12wbt world they understand me & they were like my surfboard this afternoon - they kept me afloat while I rode that emotional wave of anxiety & got me safely to shore. Without their support today, I would've surely had a wipe out!
So a HUGE thank you to those lovely ladies. I hope I can repay the favour some time soon.
I love so much this 12wbt family that I have found. Everyone has a story and that is what brings us together.
Sometimes I feel so alone & that no one else understands how things are for me, but this year I've found out that's not true.
'Somebody that I used to know' (yes, that Gotye song is the one that was going round in my head last night), would've eaten or drank those emotions I felt today, but instead I got through it 'With a little help from my friends'.
xxx
